Bron-Bron

I just caught the end of the first half of the Cavs-Magic game. What are the chances that Lebron James is either a) an alien b) a robot , or c) a government experiment. Any of the 3 are easier to belive than he's just a regular human. His skill set, talent, and body are unprecedented. I noticed that ESPN was running an article and debate about whether or not he could play in the NFL. Here is the link. http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4194437 Am I the only one that thinks this is a humongous duh. I mean he played football in high school and had college interest from Notre Dame and Ohio State. He may be one of the freakiest athletes EEEEVVVVVEEEERRRRRRR! I don't care what sport you want to name (with the exception of jockey or cockswain) he could be exceptional at it. What do you think, name a sport that his athletic ability wouldn't translate to?

PETA Protest

Today I attended my first protest. Mind you, I was not there to support either side of the issue, just to be there. I had high hopes that a PETA protest at the McDonalds on Brainerd Road would be something to see. Boy was I right.

As we pulled up, this is what we saw.

They were protesting the way McD's kills their chickens. Apparently by scalding them alive. It sounds bad and all, and sure, I don't the chickens I am going to eat to suffer, but I question the planning of this protest a little bit. First, why Chattanooga? Why this Mcdonald's? Do we really think that the McDonald's lunch crowd is going to be so struck by the dynamite human diorama, that they will leave McD's without their lunch?

Now I didn't want to come across as a total jerk. Even though I walked up with my phone out ready to take pics. So, I listened to the PETA spiel, and tried to act like I wasn't just staring at the the girls in the red water. Cars were honking and people were rubbernecking galore. I even kept the flyer.

I will be having nightmares about being stabbed to death by Ronald McDonald tonight. Thanks PETA!

There was a reporter there from the Times-Free Press taking video. I believe that he was onto us, and asked me for a sound byte. I was able to quickly shift the spotlight to my friend Jake, by saying "No thank you. But this guy will do it." My buddy didn't have time to refuse, because the reporter said okay ready go. He was a little flustered and not sure about what he said. They could actually edit it to make him come across as a supporter or hater of PETA.

Here he is below. I really hope his blurb or video makes their website.

Now I don't want to support the torture of my mcnuggets, but I wasn't exactly moved by the protest either. While I may not have had my mind changed I came away with some awesome memories. I think I will have to start going to more protests. They seem pretty awesome.

Keep an eye on your bacon!

There are so many things that intrigue me about this story. First of all, who would call the police to report tha you were robbed and all that was missing was 5lbs of bacon? No, they didn't take money, electronics, our cars, just the bacon. Second, the wife allowed her husband to call the police to report said bacon stolend, knowing that she had eaten it. That's pretty cold. Third, how was she able to eat 5lbs of bacon? I don't think I could do more than 1 or 1.5 lbs. Fourth, how did she get up in the middle of the night, and cook 5 lbs of bacon without her husband, or even the neighbors smelling it? Even when she came back to bed, wouldn't she reek of bacon? Unless she ate it raw, or snuck outside and cooked it on a camp stove. I just have to imagine that this isn't the first time that something has gone "missing" from their fridge. Maybe that's what set the husband off. He was tired of being victimized by this food bandit. Good Grief. (This article was taken from Failblog.org)

What the French Toast Part 1

Something I saw recently.

Have you seen the commercials for the new and amazing slim clip. You can check it out here https://www.slimclip.com/ver13/index.asp#ordernow . This amazing new invention is a piece of metal that clips around your money and credit cards. Seriously? It is a money clip!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Didn't President Lincoln carry a money clip? I don't care if it does have two sides. And guess what, they dropped it into a regular blender and it didn't get chopped into little pieces. (Side note: if you do want to watch all kinds of stuff get chopped up in a blender, then here is your paradise. http://www.willitblend.com/ ) If you're sold on the slim clip, then you should check out my new invention, the wheel. Email me for ordering information.

It's summer movie season

We are beginning to enter summertime, which means one thing. Movie premieres. I started thinking back to my childhood to the first big movie I remember waiting to see. The answer was obvious and is still one of my favorites, KARATE KID II. I went with all caps to emphasize my strong feelings. I still remember how jacked I was waiting to see the sequel to one of the best movies ever made, KARATE KID. Karate Kid was pretty much the perfect storm of awesome. You had Daniel Larusso who was kind of dorky, who could relate to that. Next you had the Cobra Kai's who were hateable but had those B.A. black karate uniforms. Finally Mr. Miyagi with his crane technique. The scene before the finals when he smacked his hands together and started rubbing to generate heat still gives me chill bumps. How could the sequel not be as awesome? Boy did it deliver! Daniel-son and Mr. Miyagi travel to Okinawa and face-off against Sato and Cobra-Kai Far East. Just when the crane was getting played out, we get the arm swinging drum. Again, the chill bumps still pop up when all the people at the festival are banging them back and forth in unison. I remember other big summer movies, but none have yet matched the magic of KKII. Send me the first big movie you remember seeing.

Why do our roads stink?

Good grief! Someone just tipped me off to this scandal going on within the Georgia DOT. You can read the article here: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/23/us/23georgia.html . It is mind-bottling the extent to which this is happening. Let's just say that the GADOT does not have the best reputation as far as being people-friendly. I guess it is because they would rather be "interacting" with each other instead of the public.

Why not!

So I have finally made it. I have the power to write my thoughts and anyone could find them and read them. It doesn't get any bigger than this. Wait, what? You mean anyone can write a blog? Flip, why didn't you tell me that before? I guess this won't be my ticket to fame and fortune. In that case, I'll just write jokes for myself.